How to Lose 90 RSS Subscribers in 48 Hours

Tuesday, January 5, 2010 , Posted by Johnny Fuery at 4:20 PM

Originally Published 2008-04-16 17:23:27



  1. Activate Google Apps and switch your mail server mx settings over to the big G.

  2. Absentmindedly change the email system that has been working for you for half a decade, realize the contact management and history migration are going to be painful, then come up with the temporary solution of mail forwarding.

  3. Inadvertently create a circular reference (an infinite loop for those of you that happen to be programmers or just know Apple's corporate address off the top of your head) by forwarding messages to yourself. To yourself. To yourself. To yourself. To... oh, you get the picture.

  4. Be busy enough so that you don't notice PHP errors or Bandwidth Exceeded messages appearing on your web site/blog.

  5. Have the alert email on your web host configured to forward to an address you don't use any more.

  6. Realize you have a problem, call your web host, have them give you a solution that seems inherently risky and prone to data loss.

  7. Do it anyway.

  8. Repeat step 4.

  9. Get a message from one of your contractors (1099 employees) that your site is down. Get another message from a client. Realize you're an idiot and should never have listened some douchebag answering the phone at 10pm telling you not to worry about the crazy hack he's about to perform on your income-generating site when you know he really hasn't considered the impact of what he's suggesting.

  10. Logon to wordpress, realize that your site has been down for at least two days, and sigh heavily. (So that's why I suddenly got so much comment spam... from 8 comments a day to 300 over the last 48. Dammit! Repeat step 4.)

  11. Fix issues, realizing that the problem is due to the fact that the 20 plugins you have installed have all been deactivated. Feedburner, Akismet, Threaded Comments, you name it. Sigh more heavily.

  12. Do a 3 minute round of QA on your site. Note dead links.

  13. Log back into wordpress and realize you've lost all your static pages.

  14. Log into MySQL and search for said content.

  15. Realize you've lost those pages, probably forever.

  16. Post said experience to blog, deferring the broken link fixes for the time being, noting to self that a site redesign is long overdue anyway. Hey, the 96 readers left will have a good laugh at your misfortune. Right? RIGHT?


Everyone clear on that? btw, I could use a full time LAMP developer if anyone is interested... must not think Ajax is a cleanser. Email me at... aw crap. The contact page is down.

Comments

On 2008-05-05 03:35:35 Abhishek said:
Damn I need to Check Gapps for My website!!
Started Service For 2 month ago but didn't check any of such!!

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